Fragments

09 Feb Fragments

Like a tumbling stone or shell

I messed up. I can’t sleep. 
I’ve unleashed something I can’t control.
I lost the lid – can’t stuff it back in.
Is this mania? Is that how it feels? 
To forget to eat 
consumed by the visceral need to release?
Ten years of stored emotion 
overwhelming like a raging ocean 
thrashing against my legs.
The undercurrent wrapping itself 
around my ankles.
Can’t focus on anything else.
Waves crashing into me
dragging fragments back to the sea 
like a tumbling stone or shell.

What a hell! 
I cannot escape until it’s all finally freed.
Verge of insanity or genius?
Is there even a difference?
Can’t gather words to speak 
in normal company 
everything’s a lyric to gasp or yell.

Like a broken faucet, but not a drip.
More like overflowing, 
it has a grip over how I must 
choose to exist.
Except there’s no choice 
I am a prisoner 
along on this trip 
this car with no brakes 
it forsakes all that I do.

Maybe it’s just a fever dream.
Maybe I just drank too much caffeine.
Maybe I’ll run out of steam.

Collection: By the Window  |  Section: Fragments
Note: This is not a finished poem but rather an intrusive thought that might become something of more importance later. Things like this are what exist within my "ideas" folder. The process is just as important as the product.